Words for my readers

I'M BACK~! Finally am home, my malaysia's home. But am still in very lazy mood, bz to meet friends and having my malaysia makan tour in this few days, of course rest very well, travel is tiring, especially backpack.

Well am not goin to write much, am waiting my personal writer come back from Manchester and update for me (ahahaha, you know am talking bout you). While waiting him back, better upload some photos or my readers will mad (yes Megan, i know you really mad now ;P). I would like to upload more but those photos aren't with me, so juz wait patiently readers~!

The Winged Victory of Samothrace, Louvre Museum, Paris.

Paris traditional market

Disneyland Village, Paris

Arc De Triomphe with me

The hostel that i stayed in London

Again no photo update

Another photo-less quick update, juz because am too damn bored waiting the time pass in Mc.Donald.

My coach at 1130pm yet i hv to check out from hostel by 10am, mean tat i hv to stay outside till 1130pm, and the best way to kill time is shopping, and online. Finally done shopping and now online in Mc. Donald.

Suddenly feel hard to leave UK, although i miss home like hell last few days. Meet lots of great people in the whole journey, envy some of them going for their backpack in somewhere else, yet i hv to go back to Malaysia in less than 24 hours time. Hope i hv more time and money to explore to more places.

Anyway am not sad though for going back to my hometown soon. Miss home, friends and family so much, and of course my little Cookie. So people, pls prepare for the return of RACHEL~!



London, UK
20080918, 0653pm a.k.a last day in United Kingdom
Rach in complicated mood

Quick update

no photo blog, am online in Mc Donald coz the stupid hostel will charge on the Wi-Fi, Mc. Donald is the only choice yet the line is lousy, damn slow wen uploading photos.

this is the last 2 days that i stay in London, which mean i goin back to malaysia after 2 days~!!! Gosh i cant wait to meet my frens and long lost Malaysia FOOD!

this blog gonna b the short blog coz i hv too many things to share with my readers, yet i hv no idea how to start with. Just simply tell my readers tat am doin fine, meet some great people in the hostel and am getting enjoy to being alone in London :)

opps, if Zoe is reading this blog, she will get mad, ahahahahaha.. she's the one accompany me and became my private GPS in London for few days. :P

alright goin to end this blog, will upload soon (hopefully, all my photos with Ivan and the rest of my coursemates), will try to recall my memory and upload as detail as possible :P




London, UK
20080916, 0915pm
Rach in enjoy being backpacker mood.

i'm still alive

just come back from euro trip

more photos are coming :)

in London and going back to Malaysia SOON!!!!!!

pray for me readers

muarckk :D

London, UK

20080913, 0914pm
Rach in backpacking mood

Announcement

i know i shouldn't let my readers wait for my recent, but I AM IN HOLIDAY okey?!

Finally, done the hell giler tough 3 months for the stupid degree cert, it was like a nightmare, and i cant believe i had overcome such a hell 3 months that i ever have in my life.

First of all, this not gonna be long post, juz to tell my readers am might not goin to update my blogs for at least 2 weeks, cause.....

I'M GOING TO BACKPACKING IN EURO AND LONDON~!!

i guess will hardly to get internet access and i have very limited and tight budget, anyway i will try online if there hv free Internet access.

So people juz pray for me, pray for a safe journey and i will be back~!



Liverpool, UK
20080901, 1208pm
Rach in enjoying nothing-to-do mood.

New Journey

This is just the begining, it's not the end :-)

Liverpool, UK
20080828 a.k.a end of my university life, 1029pm
Rach in welcoming my new journey mood.

real update

1. Fainted
   Yea fainted at last weekend, and really scared my friends like hell coz i fainted without any sign, except i'm suddenly feel dizzy when i stand up from sofa (which is pretty normal for me, as am anemia).
   Sit down back and migrant, i tot i can at least walk back room (i was in kitchen that time) but i cant even stand well (i felt i stand well yet others said am swinging). They forced me to sit down and i fainted, i don't know how i get back to my room and i dunno why am fainted as well.
   According to Dr. Ivan Yong (ahahaha), he said my mind and body shut down coz too tired. And i hv to admit tat am really stress and lack of sleep few days continuosly, coz there were 2 deadlines in the same week and i dunno wat the hell of the assignment questioning about.
   I ended up like doing the readings and research on the question like no tomorrow, made really thick tea to kept myself awake, and tat cause my body couldn't support my mind, and fainted.
   The following days i felt like am sitting on a sampan, and having seasick. I saw everything like moving except myself, forced to skipped one day class and felt so upset, not for skipping the class but missing my home.
   
   
2. Ivan's boy-turns-to-man Project
   Doesn't mean the smooth criminal rapes Ivan successfully (the detail pls link to http://jingonline.tumblr.com/page/5, the entry at 5 of July... hehehe), but Ivan decided to gives her mum a big surprise, he wants to dye his hair~! As Zoe is half pro-hair stylist, and am the busy-body future journalist, so the project were proudly presented by Zoe and Rach. Ahahahaha.. lazy to tells the detail, link to his blog and read more detail!
   
   
3. Buffet and Souvenir Hunting's Day
   After submited the fu*king assignment by thursday, went for shopping with housemates and Ivan at Friday, hunts for the souvenir for my friends and family as another 2 weeks to stay in Liverpool. Got most of the souvenirs and only leave couples of friend have no idea wat to buy for them.
   Went for chinesse buffet as lunch with Ivan, Jenn and Griza, enjoyed the very delicious time with my fellow friends. Made me miss my mum's cooking a lot!
   
   

The foods!



Griza & me





Jenn & me


4. Almighty Ivan Project.
   Right after shopping and got back to apartment, girls were busy ready the surprise party for Ivan's 22 years old birthday!! Ivan went spot by spot and collected the clues of where was his birthday present hiding. A really crazy and unbeliable night! I bet no one of us will forget till his or her last breath!
   Happy Birthday Ivan Sang! Thx for take care of me wen i'm sick, hope our frenship will last forever!
   p/s: It doesn't mean u can bully me forever okay~!
   


5. Elegant Day
   Sleep at 6am, and woke up at 12pm, and Griza called for goin to Museum, shower and dress up then out to Museum with huge panda eyes. Went to National Museum Liverpool a.k.a Zoo Liverpool. It wasn't a typical museum but 3 out of 5 floors were aquarium, bugs and animals, and space. 3 of us wondered we were in musuem or zoo. Overall the museum is intersting and not bored at all, it u guyz hv the chance to come to Liverpool, this museum is something u couldn't miss it :)
   The Walker Art Gallery juz next to the museum, of course we won't walked out for one museum only, althought we leave 1 and half hours from the closing time of the gallery, we still walked in to have a look. And i think i will come by myself for a more detail visit again :)
   
   
6. Plan for my trip
   This is wat make my mood ups and downs a lot wen planning it, juz simply because the plan keep changing and alot of uncertainly, plus the limited budget and unfamiliar with the place, sometime juz feel wanna give up and go back to malaysia without any trip plan.
   Finally the plan was confirm, will go for Europe trip for 1 week, and back to London for another week, then take coach to Manchester airport and back to Malaysia alone. Hopefully not over budget and i'll enjoy the plan.
   

----------------------------

- another assignment and exam to go, and i'll get my life back SOON!
- i cant believe 3 months i was here.
- missing malaysia
- what i will be after this?

Liverpool, UK
20080825, 1103am
Rach in blue mood

update full of updatesssss

update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update update


For who were asking for my update, this is my "update".
Am juz not-so-ok, will update the real update after this Thurs.


p/s: i miss home, miss babby, miss cookie, miss my friends, miss my room, miss my bed, miss my little Kelisa, miss everything and anything in Malaysia.

dun care

Crumble by the bloody result, being siao for few days and totally do nothing although another 2 assignments deadline in the coming week. End up with do nothing in this week, and i decided to juz enjoy this week. By the way juz don't worry me much my frens, am pretty ok now and i juz wanna set myself free, tat's it.

I was remembered everyone is so jealous on my long-straight-shinning black hair, everyone asked me to keep my hair long and i do think so. Am juz so proud with my long hair and i treasure it so much.

April 2008 - Me with my long hair

And today, i decided to chop my long hair down~! Don't ask me y coz i don't know either, just feel like i don't care anymore.

August 2008 - chopped

-------------------------

Zoe - thx for da free chopping
Elaine - am alright and i know u r helpless too
Eva - am sorry for da belated bday wishes, i love ya and happy bday gal.

-------------------------

- i dun care and why should i care?
- i wanna get my life back
- anyone / company / press needs a siao reporter or editor?



Liverpool, UK
20080814, 0115pm
Rach in don't care mood

...

Depression

about yourself:
nobody likes me; I'm worthless; I'm unlovable
I am doing really badly on this course
I'm a failure; I will be criticised; I will be rejected
I am a fraud - I should not be here
nobody will ever want to have a relationship with me


about your situation:
Cambridge is a horrible place
I will never be able to do all the work
I don't fit in; I'm different; I will always be alone
I have nothing in common with anyone here


and/or about the future:
it's hopeless; I won't be able to cope
things will never get any better
I am always going to feel like this

I'm juz simply stupid, i'm juz not up to the standard.

Video update

Thesis draft? Done!

Assignment? Done!

Next assignment? DON'T CARE!!!

So from last Friday onward, i do NOTHING!

Just wanna tell my readers, especially my Babby bear, i will relax, just don't worry ya. Tryin best to not release my stress by wrong way, so, DON'T NAG me :P.

Was chat with Sun and she told me she SHAVED my Kinki baby! and he's freaking ugly now! She hv no choice coz he hv skin allergy ;(... pity my Kinki baby..

video tat Sun sent to me, my god son Kinki

Kinki make me miss my cookie, found this video, make me even miss him... :(...

Miss ya Cookie *sob*

I saw the sunset, and seeing the sunrise.

Has been a while disappear from my blog, juz simply busy but not forget bout my readers.

Having the hard week, where gonna submit my thesis draft and a don't-know-how-to-do assignment. Anyway edy done the assignment, juz for focus on my thesis which will weight 12 credit hours in my whole semester.

Planned to finish the whole thesis by Thursday, then i hv time to re-check my assignment by Thursday night or midnight before submit to the office. For finishing up 2 chapters from my thesis that i leave, i prepared very well by throwing 2 tea bag in a 250ml of boil water, if only u can image how thick of the tea was. And the tea kept me awake until the next day 8 am. This is what refer to my blog and msn's title - "i saw the sunset, and seeing the sunrise."

I get my thesis officially done by 7 something in the morning, gonna complete it with appendix, tables, re-check literature reviews, reference, biliography, check the grammer and structure after re-check my assignment later.

The main point isn't not complaining how the university torture us (trust me, am not INTEND to HINTS something. Trust me, MR. IQBAL!). The main point is because of 7 moduels, 14 assignments, 1 thesis, 1 presentation, 1 examination throughout this 3 months, helps me to saw countless time of sunset of today and sunrise in the next days. So what should i complain since university likely to helps me spent all my life's romantic sunset and sunrise moments in only 3 months? I bet i will not enjoy to waiting the sunset and sunrise moment with my future Mr.Right anymore. T.T..

5 smth in the early morning.

Thx my little Greeny fully supports and accompanies me 20 hours non-stop, and don't not complain even once time. I will love ya forever my little Greeny baby! muarck muarck

No matter how many times i told my Greeny i'm goin to throw him to the floor, he never try excapes and stands still in front of me.. hehe..

-------------------------

Griza & Ivan - Relax lah~ hv to practise malaysia culture le kawan.
Babby - I miss ur accompany Babby, u always there for me wen am rushed my assignment in college time.. *tears drop*
Jimmy - No matter how bz am i, i'll there for u wen u need me... errr.. there for u for couple of minutes.. hehe
Zoe - I saw the sunset, and seeing the sunrise, and i see u too! tong dou zhong yan wor! ahaha

-------------------------

- stupid ppl do stupid things.
- don't expect and don't compare, do your best and get the result proundly (Rachel, 2008)
- 3 weeks to go, and i will get my life back wow!

Liverpool, UK
20080807, 1256pm
Rach in thankful for "sunset and sunrise project" by LJMU.

Welcome my Da & Xiao BB

Finally bought backpack and daypack for my backpacking trip, my da bb (backpack) cost me ₤40 with 70 litre (equal to 70 kg) capacity, which was much more cheaper than i expect (happy happy~), and he is already approved by Ivan with ISO 2008!! hehehe.. not to forget my xiao bb too (daypack) that can swallow 25 litre of stuffs, which cost me ₤14, and i juz love the design! it looks cool!
Cant wait for my backpacking trip!! :D

My da BB

My xiao BB

Da & Xiao BB

back view

Side view

Although am trying hard to protect my da & xiao bb in my room, but i know both of them will get rape by housemates someday, juz because am keep promote my da bb can carries 70 kg of stuffs, and finally.. the day is come..

They call themselves "tester", i call them "criminal"

Step 1

Step 2

Step 3

Step 4
(i heard my da bb crying)

Anyway it prove my da bb is strong! muahahahhaha i might consider to carry Griza with my da bb to train my shoulder before backpacking, ngek ngek ngek XD~~

link to one of the criminal blog ~ http://pinkporkchop.blogspot.com

And what i had promised that i will post the silly-dumbly photos taken wen 4 of us wen to Albert Dock (by the way, i went for the 5th times last night with 3 of them plus Ivan! Although i keep telling myself i hv tons of things hv to do T.T).

We scared lots of people wen taking this series of pictures, coz it juz by the road side.

Not to forget my hunting superlambanana project, we found 7 of them on the way to Albert Dock tat night :D.

----------------------------------------

Elaine - thx darling, yea am goin to miss u, muarck!
Ken - u owe me movie~ nananana~
Jimmy - Congratulation dude >,^

----------------------------------------

- 2 months in Liverpool, time is flying.
- thx gals,u guyz save me from depression :)
- i hate Habermas, grrrrrrrrrrr.....

Liverpool, UK
20080801, 1102am
Rach in backpack mood.

Expression of release

Went for walk with Zoe, Jenn & Griza in Albert Dock AGAIN. The 4th times i been there, and not feeling bored yet, the night view of Albert Dock is juz simple attractive. Anyway this not gonna update the silly-dumbly pictures we took in the street, not getting it from Griza and Jenn's cameras yet.

I love the walk alone in the big busy city centre, not only in Liverpool, in KL too. Of course Liverpool's comfort weather encourages me to walk even more. While girls were bz taking picture, i walked along the dock and feel the feeling of alone. The alone here of course is positive kind of alone, alone can be understand as freedom sometime :)

This kind of mood made me recall lot of memories, with family, friends, people, everything and anything, and including him. Well am not trying to talk bout him here, is enough to do so in my old blog. Juz wanna express the miss in my heart :). Yea i'm not deny am missing him, hmmm.. or i should say am missing the old-sweet-days?

I'm realize he's not in my heart, he lost the power to bring my mood ups and downs that he did in last time. Am not missing him, but miss the days we spent together, just like i miss the happy days spent with my cousin and friends. He has become the part of my memories but not all of my memories anymore.

Forgiveness is a gift i give myself. At the moment, i'm feel am free from the prison :)

The part of my memories

--------------------

KC - Love does not measure, it juz gives. U owe me nth, so release urself too :)

--------------------

Liverpool, UK
20080730, 1154pm
Rach in release mood

Zoe's Birthday

Here i post wat i had promise, karaoke for celebrated Zoe's birthday!

Anyway this gonna be another picture's blog, lazy to blog, sleepy~~

The princess of the day ~ Zoe Chan Timun ahahahahah :P


Ivan is singing, we are photo-ing


Leave Jane (too bad v don't hv a group picture)

The karaoke including foods, and here is the foods section, and the main point is, IS CHINESE FOODS! i miss mummy cooking :(






Each kisses from each people, wish you happy birthday ya Timun! We love you! Muarcckkk..

Tong Xue Ai~

p/s: Woon Seong Hock, see la, ur gf hv the other one in UK la! ahahahha

Mrs. Cook here LOL

Wat i'm currently listen to. Keep playing this song for almost a month. Gosh i fancy David Cook! he's mine! :)



Always Be My Baby - David Cook Music Code


We were as one babeFor a moment in timeAnd it seemed everlastingThat you would always be mine
Now you want to be freeSo I'm letting you flyCause I know in my heart babeOur love will never dieNo!
You'll always be a part of meI'm a part of you indefinitelyGirl don't you know you can't escape meOoh darling cause you'll always be my babyAnd we'll linger onTime can't erase a feeling this strongNo way you're never gonna shake meOoh darling cause you'll always be my baby
I ain't gonna cry noAnd I won't beg you to stayIf you're determined to leave girlI will not stand in your wayBut inevitably you'll be back againCause ya know in your heart babeOur love will never end no
You'll always be a part of meI'm part of you indefinitelyGirl don't you know you can't escape meOoh darling cause you'll always be my babyAnd we'll linger onTime can't erase a feeling this strongNo way you're never gonna shake meOoh darling cause you'll always be my baby
I know that you'll be back girlWhen your days and your nights get a little bit colder oooohhhI know that, you'll be right back, babeOoooh! baby believe me it's only a matter of time
You'll always be a part of meI'm part of you indefinitelyGirl don't you know you can't escape meOoh darling cause you'll always be my babyAnd we'll linger onTime can't erase a feeling this strongNo way you're never gonna shake meOoh darling cause you'll always be my my baby....
You'll always be a part of me (you will always be)I'm part of you indefinitelyGirl don't you know you can't escape meOoh darling cause you'll always be my babyAnd we'll linger on (we will linger on....)Time can't erase a feeling this strongNo way you're never gonna shake meOoh darling cause you'll always be my baby
Always be my baby

Another 24 hours for the deadline, and i dunno wat i wrote in my shitty essay.

Liverpool, UK
20080726, 0933am
Rach in Mrs. Cook mood.

Video share

found this in my folder, make me laugh while rushing the bloody assignment. The proof of fool around with my housemates :)

cheer~

Liverpool, UK
20080726, 0927am
Rach in a little bit happy mood :)

back to figth with dying heart

Friday night.

Sound fun and relax right, yea it is, only it's not for me :(

I spent 2 days for do nothing but only watched cartoon, eat and sleep to recover my mood. So today i getting better, and i think i better catch up my assignment which gonna pass up in this coming monday. No worries my dears, i will not give up, i still will try all my best to complete this assignment, as i said, am in half way, i can only move forward.

Was web-caming with Elaine for few hours this noon, cheer bit after chat with her, i really missed the old days gossiping with her and Eva, how wish i can fly back to M'sia and get back my old day at this moment.

I still struggle for my assignment, not even start the 1st point yet, and i dunno how am i going to complete this essay. I dunno wat the question asking about, i scare to guess wat my lecturer expect to see in my essay, till the end, i do nothing still, although u hv a ton of assignments are coming one by one.

Anyway went for karaoka and dinner with housemates last night, for celebrated Zoe's birthday and i really need to dump all things beside to relax. 8 of us enjoyed very much and we took lots of picture, will updated soon, perhaps after monday :).

faceless Rach as Stefen & Elaine both say i'm look ill.

Pray for me friends, c ya.

------------------------

Zoe - Mrs. Woon, happy birthday la!
Elaine - Thx darling for spending time for me :)

Sunny - Sorry kid i was rushing this morning, perhap next week could hv a nice chat with ya.
Stefen - Good luck will come after all the bad luck :)

------------------------

- unforgettable moment happened, someone has replace the old memories.
- nvr expect she's such a double-faces and selfishness people.

- still feel uncertainly for my future.

Liverpool, UK

20080725, 1104pm

Rach in down-down mood.

Dying

this gonna b no-photo-blog, i hv no mood to take photo.

Lecturers gave us a short talk regarding our mini thesis after the class today. Obviously because most of us get low mark in this mini thesis, and this carry 24 credit hours.

Although am not the lowest one, am actually in quite ok marks if compare with the rest, but this is still out of my expected mark, i planned to catch up my credit hours in this mini thesis and i really try my best of the best to do it. I tried to b ok after i get back my assignment, juz dun want my gals worry bout me, but i cant control to b moody. This is the 1st time i feel pressure untill dropping my tears. Not for regret to not putting enough effort, but i dunno wat to do to get the higher mark. I done all i can do, i cant stop asking myself that am i tat stupid? I'm not deserve to get higher marks? Just.. wat should i do..?

I feel like cant even handle the Uni's assignment, how am i going to handle my work in the future? I really doutb on my ability, how am i going to complete the rest of the assignments? i'm really lost my confidence. No matter how hard i tried, how many effort i put into my assignments, i'm still in this level. Only maintaining, not improving at all.

I dunno how to complete my next assignment and thesis. I'm totally lost, i dunno wat's the examiner looking for in my assignment, even though i did consulted them, i dunno wat should i produce in the assignment, i feel hell stress, i dare not to start my next assignment yet, i dunno what should i do, what's the problem on me in producing the assignment.

-----------------------

SeePin - sorry i know i scared u, i'll b alright, thx for understanding gal :)
God - am i juz simply stupid?

-----------------------

- I'm repeating my high school's life. Eat and vomit.
- Migraine is killing me, i feel like dying.
- I'm dying.. i juz cant breath.. i dunno how to release the stress..


Liverpool, UK
20080723, 0455pm
Rach in dying mood.

Jane's Bday & Japan's day!

Another update ALTHOUGH i'm damn bz for my assignments

19 of July~ Jane's birthday! Pictures say thousand words, wat else better than this?

Princess of the day :)

V love u Jane! Happy Bday!! (click for larger image)

The next morning, Ivan made us delicious bruschetta~

all made by Ivan and he's still available!

Ivan the chef

V were actually plan to dine out for celebrate Jane and Zoe bday, but finally v delay it to next week, at the same time v get to know bout a Japan fair nearby our Uni. So that 6 of us ahead to the fair and v really hv fun!

Kawaii neh! (click for larger image)

Japan- style-us

6 of us :D

Is a tired day and i hv to stay up to complete my assignment T.T.. i will write more in the next blog! C ya!

---------------------------

Gals & Ivan - happy house happy house happy happy happy house (Kath, 2008) :P
Mum - i'm doing well, no worries :)
Cookie - Jie jie miss u so much le kie kie :(
Jane - U r the most beautiful gal in da world!..... for today :D
---------------------------

- i hate reality T.T
- sunday, working day for me
- assignment never end :(


Liverpool, UK
20080719, 1133pm
Rach in Japan mood :)